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Perez Hilton; The Black Eyed Douchebag

June 7, 2010

We all remember old Perez Hilton. You know, that gay guy that blogs? (HA. Imagine that) To make things more amusing, he just dishes out celebrity gossip. Based on the majority of the comments he gets on his blog, he’s not as awesomesausage as he thinks he is.

Anyways, I wouldn’t be wasting time talking about this wank, but I just can’t believe how he’s just got his panties in a bunch over Rush Limbaugh gettin’ hitched:

Rush Limbaugh Getting Married Again!

What kind of women keep marrying this asshole?!

Rush Limbaugh is getting married to 33-year-old Kathryn Rogers next week in West Palm Beach! They have been engaged for over a year with Kathryn sporting quite the rock on her hand for some time.

“We try to live our lives as normal people,” says Rush. “We do NOT seek media attention, we do not want it, especially for this. It is very special, obviously, and we just don’t want any media attention.”

They first met in 2004 at a golf tournament/fund-raiser when Rush was getting divorced from his third wife Marta. Kathryn says:

“I grew up so differently, traveling around the world, that I’m sometimes not able to relate to the average person my age. Rush has such amazing experience.”


Sounds like they deserve each other — and that she has gotten accustomed to a certain life$$$tyle!

Basically, Perez says: “WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH”. No, really.

But, what’s even funnier is how it just lit the fuse on Perez’s tampon when he heard mega-gay Elton John was going to sing for Mr. and Mrs. Limbaugh. (Get it? Marriage? Mr. + Mrs.? Man + Woman? Nyuk nyuk nyuk.) He whines about it on his blog: (Beware, extreme vaginal leakage)

Why??? Sir Elton Sings At Rush Limbaugh’s Wedding

We hope that hefty $1 million price tag was worth it!

Conservative radio host and all around assface Rush Limbaugh headed down the aisle for the FOURTH time Saturday night, marrying fiance Kathryn Rogers (who is almost 30 years younger than him!) at the Breakers Hotel in Palm Beach, FL in front of 400 of their closest friends and family.

And who was Rush’s #1 choice for wedding entertainer?

Sir Elton John!


Elton reportedly got a hefty paycheck of $1 million to serenade the couple at the wedding. We hope it was worth it!

Uh, hello? Apparently it was. Do you even make a paycheque? Like, really… what are you accomplishing with your life, Mr. Hilton? What do you do for a living? Douchebaggery is not a valid profession. And you talk about the age difference between Rush and Kathryn as if that makes them some kind of sexual deviants. Dude, you stick things in your fucking BUTT.

Oh, you.

8 Comments leave one →
  1. June 7, 2010 8:30 pm

    He is an ASSHOLE.
    Bob A.

  2. June 8, 2010 8:59 pm

    Indeed he is. Do you remember that video he posted crying about Prejean’s beliefs on gay marriage?


    Imagine Amy Winehouse mixed with Chris Crocker. o_o It’s that bad.

  3. June 13, 2010 12:50 am

    Mr. Limbaugh is a very nice man, which is surprising when you consider his radio-personality. Perez Hilton makes me sick to my stomach, only in today’s celebrity-obsessed, commercialist culture could we actually have someone like that making money for his “ideas”. Which generally consist of calling anyone who disagrees with him a homophobe and an asshole, complete with god-awful grammar.

    • June 14, 2010 7:28 pm

      I love Rush. People who think he’s an ass don’t understand intelligent humour. They can’t think “outside the box”. Well, that or they choose not to for the sake of being ignorant.

      Perez Hilton is a nobody, and I think it kills him. I e-mailed him this article (oh God, I had to go to his site. It WAS awful… the grammar… THE GRAMMAR) 😉 My grammar isn’t the best, but he types exactly the way he speaks. Spine-shatteringly annoying.

      He never got back to me on that. Curious.

      • June 16, 2010 3:35 am

        This man’s grammar makes 12 year olds on Facebook look like fucking English majors.

        I personally prefer Mark Levin, did you ever pick up his book?

  4. June 16, 2010 12:20 pm

    I know. Twelve year olds can have better conversations on TWITTER, for the love of God.

    I love Mark Levin! I sure do have his book. 🙂

    • June 16, 2010 9:30 pm

      I love how that voice of his doesn’t match up to the way he looks. At all. It’s pretty comical, actually. I just wish I could catch him more often. When I was back in Oklahoma I got to listen to his show every night while doing my rounds of feeding the animals, it was pretty great.

      • June 16, 2010 9:39 pm

        Haha. I KNOW!! I expected something completely different when I saw his photo for the first time. He’s RIGHT ON on everything he speaks about. I love him. I’ve spoken to him three times, I think. Once, I asked him what he was wearing. It caught him off guard and he replied “What I ALWAYS wear at this hour. A NIGHTGOWN.”

        Haha. He’s a funny man.

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